We all wonder: “Do I know what I’m talking about?”
I know that what I have to give is a way of thinking, a way of honoring effort, of building skills, of seeing and hearing, of creating empathy - and that comes from who I am and how I am, not only what I know. As it turns out, this is the same thing I want parents to know about parenting.
Rebel Therapist Podcast Transcript
Working closely with a group of entrepreneurs and program developers has given me a chance to observe the ways that we ALL wonder: “Do I know what I’m talking about?”...the ways that each of us in very different stages of developing our programs and businesses have felt successful and have felt less than. I’ve been inspired and learned to take risks that I wouldn’t have taken before.
How Important Is Consistency, Really?
Those Child Psychiatrists Down The Hall
You may have heard the expression “you are the expert on your child.” That is absolutely true. And equally true? It’s not as comforting as it sounds like it should be.
A Special Photo Edition: Brought to You By Omicron Quarantines
It's hard being a parent of young children right now, no matter how you're doing it, and I don't need to tell you what a wild ride this first month of 2022 has been. Instead of crafting a more thoughtful blog post, I am sending you some pictures that I've taken over the past 3 weeks as a reflection of what life with preschoolers in like in January 2022. With some added analysis, of course.
In the middle of a dark, dark tunnel
in our day to day life, how do we find flashlights to turn on when the tunnel starts to feel longer and longer? Whether the tunnel is covid or the tunnel is sleep training or sibling rivalry or getting your child into their car seat each and every morning. How do we find hope when we’re feeling hopeless? Confidence when we’re feeling defeated?
Will winter break feel like 2020 ALL OVER AGAIN?
During winter break, we’re going to be stuck inside together again: is it going to feel like remote school and 2020 ALL OVER AGAIN?
The most uncomfortable part of not knowing when it will end is the fear that it never will. We may not know exactly what the next two weeks hold in store or what omicron means for the pandemic, but there is at least one thing I do know: I know when winter break ends.
Don’t mind me, I’m locked in the bathroom
A self-sustaining practice refers to the less glamorous but equally important acts that you must make time for in the moment because you need something urgently. They are the fast food meal, the candy bar or, as my sister calls it, the emergency fountain soda, as opposed to the well-planned, carefully sourced, expertly prepared gourmet meal. “I am flipping out, I’m on my own, my kids are pulling my hair, I have oatmeal all over my shirt, it’s only 6am and daycare drop off isn’t until 9:30.” Can’t schedule a massage, might not even be able to squeeze in a shower. Maybe, just maybe, I’ll find a clean shirt. Or, “I am in between back to back meetings, important ones. And someone just announced they’re quitting. More work for me.” Don’t have time for a lunch break and can’t turn off the e-mail notifications right now, but I guess there’s time to smile at a silly picture of my kid.
Of course they made a Peloton bike for kids
Did you hear they made a Peloton bike for little kids? Of course they did. Kids love to be doing the same things as the adults in their lives.
I'm all for family bonding, but an informal, unscientific survey tells me one of the advantages of the Peloton or any other at home exercise is the opportunity to squeeze personal time into a tightly packed daily routine. In other words, a parent’s Peloton time, treadmill time, or YouTube Yoga class may very well be the only time during the day when they are not working and also not asked to wipe a runny nose/poopy butt or help with a puzzle or spell a word or fix a toy. In OTHER other words, maybe this is the only 20 minutes they get to not have to take care of anyone besides themselves.
Let your exercise time, your video games, your bath or shower, your phone call with a friend, your cup of hot cocoa be YOURS. And then go bond with your kids.
Or perhaps having your kid join you on a stationary bike while you both pedal away is what allows you to have a nap or a long chat with a friend or read a book in peace at another time of day. In which case, I say GO FOR IT! 😉
On Gratitude: reflections on the question “what are you grateful for?”
Instead of asking others “what are you grateful for?” we might instead ask ourselves “what am I hoping to accomplish by asking this question?” Do I want to share what I’m grateful for? Do I want people to thank me? Do I want to remind people about how good it can feel to express gratitude - for ourselves and for others? Is asking this question the best way to do any of these? What other ways might I try?
The Myth of Balance
"Work-life balance” leads us to believe that there is an optimal amount of work and an optimal amount of life and if we can just line these up in the right configuration, we’ll feel good about how it’s going, it’ll feel like we can do it.
But balance oversimplifies the situation. Balance is great -- if nothing ever changes.
Is it *really* OK to be scared on Halloween?
When your little one tells you they're scared, you're likely validating that fear, "it's OK to feel scared. I'm here to keep you safe." Right?
But is it really OK to feel scared? 😱
Are YOUR fears, grown up person, OK? Are they allowed?
What messages might you be sending to your kids about how OK feeling afraid really is?